Tour de France: Versus 2009 Theme Song

[Details on the Versus 2008 Tour de France theme song, Paul Weller’s “Brand New Start,” here. Details on 2010’s featured song, “Kings and Queens,” by 30 Seconds to Mars, here.]

Last year, Versus featured a song about “getting clean” for its Tour de France coverage. It was part of the network’s attempt, along with its embrace of clean-cycling missionaries Garmin-Chipotle, to position itself as a leader of the clean cycling movment (though perhaps ironically the ratings were better in the dirty-cycling years).

For 2009, Versus doesn’t have a Tour theme. But it does have a nice two-minute ad it’s playing that highlights some of the sports and events the network covers: pro cycling, bull riding, cage fighting, Formula 1 racing, killing large animals, and pro ice hockey among others. The ad features a voiceover by John Doman. If the name’s not familiar, think Rawls, the hard-bitten, cynical (and gay) deputy police chief in “The Wire.”

The music in the ad is an ethereal, ringing instrumental called “First Breath After Coma,” by a band Thom introduced me to a few years ago, Explosions in the Sky.

Here’s the YouTube version of the ad:

Crime+Fashion=Fashion Crime

Dedicated to bringing our dozens of readers only the highest-quality deep insights into the workings of the Tour de France (or TOURdafrance, as Frankie Andreu likes to say), we turn now to podium fashions. Specifically, the migraine-inducing outfits sported by the models condemned to presenting the daily trophy knick-knacks to the leader of the King of the Mountain competition. As the whole world knows, the KOM leader wears a red-on-white polka-dot jersey. Here’s renowned Tour non-winner Michael Rasmussen, without the jersey …

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… and with it:

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We’d start our fashion advice to Michael with an urgent plea for god’s sake keep your shirt on. But he’s not the focus of today’s essay. No, it’s the apparition below we want to address.

polkadots.jpg

Yes, the model is comely as all get out. She almost pulls it off, even with the thing that’s been stuck to her head. But in the world of high cycling fashion, as in the world of cycling, almost doesn’t cut it. Why? Let’s face it, outside a measles ward or a drunken company picnic, polka dots are always a tough look to carry off. But even if the mass of red spots doesn’t put you off, the lady cummerbund tied in a flouncy red bow and the parachute-style skirt should. Maybe you can only appreciate this work of fashion after seeing the podium models trying to manage it in a 20 mph wind. After watching the presentations this year, we theorize that the women presenting the King of the Mountain tchotchkes are guilty of something–maybe shop-lifting from Carrefour, the store chain that sponsors the KOM competition–and this is their punishment.

[Note: All three pictures here were uncredited and are used without permission. In order from top to bottom, they were found here, here, and here.]

Tour de France: Stage 7

Without being excessively Twitterish, I’ll just say this about Stage 7: Check out the course profiles. A lot will be decided, and a lot will change. (Steephill.tv’s Google map of the stage makes that finishing road look like a tiny, little twisting thing.)

Here’s the course profile. (I wonder how Mark Cavendish will like the stage.)

stage7profile.gif

Below: The final 10 kilometers.

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Tour de France: Timing Rules

More on the timing rules:The previous post raised the question of how Armstrong was placed second overall after Cancellara. The answer, suggested by commenter Paul (from the Netherlands) and confirmed on Bicycle.net (here) is that the judges go back to the results of the first individual time trial (Stage 1, which was not a prologue because it was longer than 8 kilometers). As Bicycle.net explains it:

In the event two riders tie for first place in the race for the yellow jersey, their times in the race’s two individual time trials would prove crucial. In such an event the fractions of seconds from the individual time trials – which are usually rounded up to the nearest second – are employed by race officials and added to the riders’ overall time to separate them.

Cavendish: On-Bike Fisticuffs

Earlier today, Mark Cavendish twittered this re: the end of yesterday’s stage (he was using Columbia teammate Mark Renshaw’s account):

Yesterday with 3km to go, Piet Rooijakkers (skil shimano) kidney punched me. Is he a:stupid b:crazy c:disrespectful d:all of the above? Cav

OK–what’s all that about? Maybe a little more than Cavendish let on. Here’s what The Guardian says:

Starting in Monaco, the stage was run in heat that touched 40 degrees and raised temperatures in the peloton, too. As the teams started to wind up for a hectic finish, the combustible Cavendish became embroiled with another rider. In his account, given at the post-race press conference, the guilty man was Kenny van Hummel, a Dutch rider with the Skil-Shimano team.

“He took his hands off the bars and hit me,” Cavendish said. “I was pretty annoyed about that. It’s disrespectful.”

According to the Skil-Shimano team the rider was Piet Rooijakkers, another Dutchman who had been barged and could not help touching Cavendish. When Cavendish allegedly reacted by tugging the Skil rider’s shirt, Rooijakkers lashed out.

Tour de France Riders Who Twitter

A brief list, along with number of followers. Some Tour and cycling notables below the race group. Send me more if you have ’em.

Name (Team) Twitter handle (linked) Followers
Lance Armstrong (Astana) lancearmstrong 1.27 million
Levi Leipheimer (Astana) LeviLeipheimer 45,913
George Hincapie (Columbia-HTC) ghincapie 28,654
David Zabriskie (Garmin) dzabriskie 17,158
Christian Vande Velde (Garmin) ChristianVDV 15,738
Mick Rogers (Astana) mickrogers 12,582
Cadel Evans (Silence-Lotto) CadelOfficial 8,863
Mark Renshaw (Columbia-HTC) markrenshaw1 4,208
Steven de Jongh (Quickstep) stevendejongh 2,616
Bradley Wiggins (Garmin) bradwiggins 1,627
Brett Lancaster (Cervelo) bdlancaster 1,286

And other notables:

Johan Bruyneel (Astana director) johanbruyneel 26,647
Greg Henderson (Columbia-HTC) Greghenderson1 960
Chris Horner (Astana) hornerakg 12,133
Robbie Ventura (Versus TV commentator) RobbieVentura 1,885
Robbie McEwen (Katusha) mcwewenrobbie 13,616
Jonathan Vaughters (Garmin director) Vaughters 1,684
Phil Liggett (Versus TV) PhilLiggett 9,348
Chris Boardman (retired fast guy) Chris_Boardman 1,341
Floyd Landis (one-time ’06 Tour winner) TheRealFloydL 6,126

Tweeting the Tour

Yes, the Tour de France started today, which is the annual early-July signal to take even more leave of my senses than usual. As the late, mostly unlamented Church Lady said, “Isn’t that special?”

My Tour Twitter feed: http://twitter.com/re_cycling

My cycling blog, which goes sadly neglected most of the time: re: Cycling

Regularly unscheduled programming will continue here at Infospigot, with occasional break-ins with cycling news of cosmic significance.

The Tour: Stage 1

The official results and standings from the TdF site: Stage 1.

Take-aways on Day 1:

–Fabian Cancellara is, as third-place finisher Bradley Wiggins said, the man.

–Alberto Contador, in second, is also a man. Even a man to be reckoned with, as Liggett/Sherwen would say.

–Astana placed four in the top 10: Contador, Andreas Klöden, Levi Leipheimer, and Lance Armstrong. What does that quartet have in common? They can all climb. If the team stays intact–out of crashes and away from injuries or other mishaps–it’s going to be a gang fight in the mountains.

–Unofficially, Armstrong won the battle today for the first TdF rider to tweet post-race. He was just ahead of Mick Rogers, Leipheimer, Wiggins, and Cadel Evans.

I will depart from tradition and register no complaints with the Versus coverage of the stage. Well, here’s one small thing: It always surprises me on the run-in to the time-trial finishes that the lads can’t give a more precise idea of how far out the riders are. I mean, the course is marked. And they have 180 riders to practice on. Instead, LiggWen get in a lather with their guesstimates of finishing times and you never know exactly whether the guys are 500 meters from the finish or 100.

We’re Back

I’ve neglected this little blog–partly a symptom of neglecting something far more serious: riding. But I won’t go into all that just now. For the next three weeks, anyway, I’m back.

In just a few hours, the lads will start clicking in and another Tour will be under way. There may have been a time earlier this season when I felt I had some idea of the shape of professional cycling this year; I mean, as much an idea as I ever have. I don’t have that sense now, and I haven’t been reading the racing media. In the U.S.A.’s general media–the San Francisco Chronicle, for instance, with its story today from a Hearst reporter somewhere–the Lance Armstrong fog has set in and set in good. Meaning that if you’re following the race from North America, it’ll be hard to see around the Lance legend during the Tour, or at least until it cracks, if it does.

Personally, I find it hard to imagine he’ll win this one. Even getting onto the podium will be tough. The competition on his own team is tough, let alone what the rest of the peloton will throw at him. Still: Contador had a low moment during Paris-Nice. Leipheimer has had some wonderful rides this year, both in California and Italy. But he didn’t produce the sort of indomitable performance in the Giro that might make you think he can break Lance.

No predictions, anyway. Except for maybe a couple non-racing ones:

–Cadel Evans will sulk, throw a memorable tantrum or two, and finish out of the money. Crikey. Even the guy’s Twitter feed sounds whiney and fussy.

–The race will be rocked by news that one of the riders was caught doping. I hope it’s Cadel.

–Paul Sherwen will not announce he’s retiring the “suitcase of courage.”

–No one will “turn themselves inside out” during the prologue Saturday. Sunday, riders might start doing just that during the first long breakaway.

–Untold numbers of riders will “dance on the pedals” shortly before experiencing “a spot of bother.” Phil Liggett says you can count on it.

–Sheryl Crow will knock Lance off his bike just as he’s about to win the Mont Ventoux stage. All she wanted was to have some fun. …

Bad Fish and Pedaling Machines

[Reposting from my other blog]

A must-see for the TdF fanatic, or even the mildly curious onlooker: “Vive le Tour,” an 18-minute documentary gem by the late French filmmaker Louis Malle. The film (available from Netflix and Amazon, among other purveyors), is a real time capsule, especially for viewers (like re:Cycling) whose Tour exposure dates back only to the 1980s.

Viveletour-1

The film depicts moments from the 1962 Tour (won, eventually, by Jacques Anquetil). There’s not much of a narrative thread–it’s an impressionistic look at the race, the racers, and the spectators. The riders’ appearance is striking: they seem old, haggard, and rather beat-up looking compared to the riders we’re used to seeing. In fact, one is reminded of pictures of baseball players in the major leagues’ alleged golden ages: these guys look like working stiffs who are riding as much to make a living as for the competition or some higher “sporting” values.

The shots of the route, the fans, the preceding caravan, the motorcycle corps that accompanies the peloton, the mountain roads–it’s all familiar stuff, but also quite foreign. You see an older, unpolished France here. The alpine routes look primitive. As wild as the crowds get today, there was even less of an imaginary barrier between them and the competitors: fans are depicted giving racers long, long pushes up the climbs. On the flatlands, the riders are shown stopping for impromptu water breaks and “cafe raids”–the latter involving physically running into cafes and carrying away bottles of water, soft drinks or even beer and champagne. We see a velodrome finish, and a slow, tortuous mountain descent.

The physical difficulty of the race and the toll on the participants is also highlighted. One rider–from his number, it appears to be Italy’s Giuseppe Zorzi–is depicted getting back on his bike after passing out and resuming his race. But not for long: he soon slows and topples to the pavement, hors de combat. (Tour references say he quit in stage six.)

But there’s one brief segment that offers a striking parallel to the age of Landis, Rasmussen and Vinokourov. There’s a scene of a very shaky looking rider–Hans Junkermann of Germany, though he’s not named in the film–climbing off his bike and settling disconsolately in a roadside ditch. The voiceover–not sure whose voice–says:

Now let’s talk about doping. In cycling slang, doping is called “the charge,” and “the charge is killing this profession. Now every time someone quits, he’s under suspicion. This racer told us he must have eaten some bad fish. That same day, ten racers quit, and each said he’d eaten bad fish. Contrary to popular belief, doping doesn’t give you extra strength. It simply suppresses the pain. The doped-up athlete no longer knows his limits. He’s nothing more than a pedaling machine.”

Bad fish. That’s one excuse we haven’t heard recently. (But here’s a little more on the “bad fish” affair of 1962.)

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