More Fun with Chemtrails

Today’s installment: An Idaho weathercaster, Scott Stevens, who has started a site dedicated to recording all the chemtrail activity he sees and that the many chemtrail investigators everywhere send him pictures of.

This is a guy who has studied the weather and makes a living standing up acting like he’s forecasting the highs and lows and storms and fair weather for the next few days. And he’s come up with his own interesting theory about the supposedly odd behavior and increasing incidence of jet condensation trails: At least some of the contrails are just contrails. But the planes that are leaving them behind are doing atmospheric research in conjunction with the development of some type of energy weapons that will be used, among other things, to manipulate the weather.

Of course, there’s more to the story than that. Stevens links to a site that contains a long Q and A with a chemtrail expert that tells all, or mostly all, about what’s going on: The trails are part of a global effort to disperse a variety of materials that will create The Shield — a barrier meant to combat meant to combat the effects of global warming. The reason we don’t know about any of this is it’s secret; and it’s secret because … well, let the experts tell you:

“Due to the severity of the situation it is mandatory to maintain public calm for as long as possible. The Earth is dying. Humanity is on the road to extinction – without the Shield mankind will die off with in 20 to 50 years. Most people alive today could live to see this extinction take place.”

Twenty to 50 years? Why are we bothering with Social Security? Or Iraq? Of course, the government is probably undertaking those projects for show — just to keep our minds off the really important stuff that’s happening “in plane sight,” as Scott Stevens says. He also urges his readers to “demand an accounting from your government, now. I know that they can’t believe they have been able to keep this secret for this long.”

OK — besides the principle of Occam’s Razor, here’s my problem with this as with so many other conspiracy theories: It all goes back to the government. Not that the government’s not capable of some secret double-dealing. But the historic examples of “the government” — any government — pulling off the kind of massive undertaking without alerting the world in general that something big is going on are rare. People blab. Even the Manhattan Project was infiltrated by Soviet spies. And once an atomic bomb was actually detonated in New Mexico, it was just a matter of time before word of what was happening down there got to the outside world (in practice, the secret only needed to be kept for about three weeks before the whole world knew we had the bomb).

But I’m digressing again.

The point is, the same government that — just a couple exhibits here — can’t figure out how to put armor on Humvees, that has blown up two spaceship crews in the last two decades and can’t seem to fly the shuttle anymore without getting in trouble — the same government most people don’t think competent to fill a pothole — is somehow credited with unerring use of its vast omnipotence to carry out its secret ends. Of course, there’s no paradox at all: the the Humvees and the Columbia blowing up are just part of the sleight of hand.

[Actually, I’m late, very late to the chemtrail picnic. USA Today was on the case in March 2001. Now they’re just part of the conspiracy, too.]

3 Replies to “More Fun with Chemtrails”

  1. Pardon me while I adjust my foil hat.
    I’m surprised the chemtrail folks are so kind in their assessment of what’s being released… I mean, at least they figure the gov’t is trying to help us, rather than spraying humanity with avian flu or Ebola or some other weird disease to keep population in check. I always thought “they” were using us as lab rats to see how our bodies might react to such viral trauma.

  2. How pathetic is this? These guys have one foot back in the primordial swamp. I mean I have an image of tv Indians talking about “fire-sticks” or some obscure tribe thinking that a person’s soul can be trapped by a camera.
    I told this story to a friend of mine today and he said, “people are just stupid” then told me about a guy he met who claimed that the WTC was closed the weekend before 9/11 and packed with explosives. Well, that explains that. I feel sorry for our country when I read this stuff. What’s next? How about a (Christian) creation myth in science class? Anyway, I’m not apoplectic over all this, just somewhat amused and concerned to think that these people are out there spreading this shite. Actually, you know this is how religions are started. We have to explain the unknown, unknowable(?) somehow.
    You also realize this kind of gullibility can be harnessed for profit. Get a list of the true-believers and work up some sort contrail-pyramid scheme…I don’t know, sell shares on the last spaceship outta’ here… say, five minutes before rapture time.

  3. I’ve been searching the Chicago skies for signs of the chem-trails, but can’t see a thing up there, because of what supposedly is a cloud cover, which everyone knows is laid down or up if you will, by Gov’t. spraying machines which operate in the dead of night, claiming to be spreading for noxious insects. Swallow that sentence if you can.

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