Left on the sidewalk out by Ohlone Park for the lucky passerby: a Hoover upright featuring so many little gizmos, features, slogans and claims it ought to be able to clean up Baghdad all by itself:
- Self Propelled (note to Hoover: use the hyphen next time)
- Premium
- Wind Tunnel Technology (accompanied by image of cyclone for dramatic emphasis)
- Bag Check Indicator
- “Picks up more dirt than any other clean-air upright” (Hoover: that hypen’s a good one)
- Green and red lights labeled “clean” and “dirty” respectively
- “Carpet is Clean When Light Is Green”
- Embedded Dirt FINDER
- WindTunnel by Hoover
- Mach 6.9
- Patented Windtunnel
This machine looks like it’s survived a few IED attacks, or at least confrontations with pets that gnawed on its attachments. I like the accompanying Post-it note that explains: “Powerful Vacuum Cleaner/needs new belts & cleaning.”
This Berkeley habit of leaving spent vacuum cleaners out on the sidewalk–it’s starting to grow on me.
