One Bread

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All American Freedom cookies (or “cookies” — closer inspection reveals they’re actually graham crackers, which ain’t cookies in my book, no way, no how). Not to be confused with American Spirit cigarettes or Freedom of Choice maxithins.   

My first thought upon looking at the packaging, early this morning before my first cup of coffee, was, “Do kids still march around with the American flag like that?” Maybe — but only in the Wii All American Freedom Cookie game from Nintendo.

A subsequent thought was prompted by inspection of the back of the package, where I read, “Provides one bread for NSLP.” In other words, this counts as a serving of bread in the National School Lunch Program. Odd phrasing: “Ms. Lunch Lady, may I please have one bread?” I don’t think so.

What is “one bread”? I turn to an under-appreciated work of modern American literature, “Subchapter A–Child Nutrition Programs: Part 210–National School Lunch Program,” a 65-page PDF document. Still haven’t found the chapter on bread.