Most Under-Reported Male Cycling Injuries

1. PowerBar embedded in nostril.   

2. Tiger Balm in shorts=groin burns.

3. Poisoning from accidental ingestion of “GU” (aka sunscreen) grabbed without looking from jersey pocket.

4. Eardrums abraded by blaring car horns.

5. Jangled nerves caused by dodging SUV drivers who couldn’t see you riding lightless at night.   

6. Ego bruising caused by riders older, fatter, more female, more uncool — and faster than you.

7. Posterior bruising from all the younger, fitter, cooler riders kicking your ass.

8. Mortification suffered when realizing the guy with the big gut reflected in the window is you.