NPR broadcast a story this morning reporting that retailers will “pull out all the stops” to move merchandise in this doleful shopping season. The report also assured us that sellers “aren’t pulling any punches” in their attempts to unload inventory.
What sort of stunt is NPR pulling here? The story could have gone much further:
–Merchants will not pull a fast one on customers.
–They are trying to pull a rabbit out of a hat. Or maybe a hippopotamus.
–They are not, however, pulling our leg. Times are tough.
–We’re all pulling for nour favorite shops to make it through the downturn. Wal-mart does not count as “a shop.”
–They will not pull the wool over anyone’s eyes. Except maybe in the hat and scarf department.
–They are trying their hardest to pull this shopping season out of the fire. Those Christmas chestnuts are getting charred.
–You don’t need to have any pull with store employees to get a good deal. Although when did it ever hurt?
–Who can resist the pull of a good sale? I’m stocking up on the buy-one, get-one-free lard bricks.
–Maybe the president will pull rank and order us all to shop. That made our problems go away after 9/11.
Pull yourself together. And once you’ve done that, remember we need to pull. Together. To help the economy pull through.